Kugan's horrifying death in the lock up brought about a mixed
reaction in our community . Many were disgusted with the way the he
was treated . Some were glad he had died so that he will not be out
of prison to commit another crime and some were upset about how quick
we were to judge a person. All of us are right in our own way of
thinking .
"Man and his deed are two distinct things. Whereas a good deed should
call forth approbation, and a
wicked deed disapprobation, the doer of the deed, whether good or
wicked always deserves respect or pity
as the case may be."
--Mahatma Gandhi
I am going to stick to my judgement . Kugan is a thief . Am I wrong
to be quick to judge an innocent man who happen to be in the wrong
place in the wrong time ? No I am not . I can tell you exactly how
Kugan was when he was alive and I won't be wrong . How he lived his
life is no longer our concern . How he died is our concern now .
Whether justice will be served or not – ( I can tell you it will not
be ) . Based on all the past records that I have gone thru , even if
the officers who caused the death of Kugan in the police custody gets
convicted , the punishment he will receive will not be up to the par
of the crime he had committed .
"Destruction is not the law of humans. Man lives freely only by his
readiness to die, if need be, at the hands of his brother, never by
killing him. Every murder or other injury,
no matter for what cause, committed or inflicted on another is a
crime against humanity."
--Mahatma Gandhi
There were few interesting mails I got from those who had read my
articles . Most of them were sad . Many had the delusion that they
were doing something good by giving a second chance to an ex-convicts
and in return got cheated and robbed of their belongings . Many kinds
souls felt everyone deserve a second chance and would go all out to
rehabilitate those who chose the wrong dark path and guide them back
to the right path . Not many succeeded . Why did they fail ? Whose
fault was it ? Why in spite of being given a second chance , the
person we try to help chooses the dark path again . Was the choice
his or was the choice forced into him ? The answer to that is within
all of us . The choice was ours . We chose to live the live we want
to live , the society forces us to chose the life we do not chose
but the forces within us decides when we cross the line .
There is a very thin line between the forces of good and evil . Some
stick to the safe side due to fear of God and his punishment . Many
cross these lines and realise the mistake and cross back and start to
live the right life . Few cross the line and enjoy the adrenaline
rush of committing a crime and enjoy the luxury and the trill. These
are the people who are the most difficult to change .
During my days has Medical Officer in the Psychiatric department ,
Thursday afternoon is the most dreaded afternoon when the hardcore
criminals from the prison are sent for assessment and treatment .
There are many of them . Each of them have an interesting stories .
There few I never forgot . This is one of them :
Dressed in white uniform , escorted by 4 prison guards with chains on
his legs and both hands hand-cuffed to the other 2 prison warden ,
stood a six foot Indian man weighing probably a 100kg . This reminded
me of the character in Tom Hanks movie . 4 prison wardens and this
huge man were enough to make my small room to appear crowded. I hate
it when my room gets crowded and that suffocates me . Anyway this man
had vibhuti and kunkumum ( thilak ) on his forehead and inspite of
his fierce look had a pious appearance . That fascinated me . He
greeted me with so much politeness. His English was good and appeared
to be an Educated men . I assumed this must be another cool cheating
case. What surprised me was on his card it was written Section 302
awaiting sentencing . Before we started our session , Prabahakaran (
not his real name ) requested for a letter to the warden to provide
him with vegetarian diet . I agreed . Initially we talked about how
life was in prison , then we went on to speak about religion . He
seems to be very religious . Spends a lot of time meditating and
praying . He reads a lot about religion . Gradually I asked him about
the crimes that he had committed . He is accused of murdering 7
people ( on the record ) . 3 happens to be Police officers and the
other 4 was members of the family whose house he had robbed . I asked
him what happen , initially he was very reluctant to talk about it .
I keep persisting since non of the wardens understand tamil , it was
safe to talk . Seeing that I was so interested he explained to me
briefly . I wanted more details . It was only then he spoke in great
detail . He had no remorse in killing those people . He describe
every crime he committed like an art . He enjoyed everything he did
and I could see it very clearly . He is not a change man . If he is
put back in the society , he will commit the same crime again . I
know many who have been sentenced to death by hanging eventually had
their sentences converted to life term based on their good behaviour
and other things . ( which I am not allowed to say ) .
Some who had committed petty crimes , found it difficult to survive
in the outside world . the society refused to give them a change .
Though they were driven with motivation to change their life and to
lead the right life , the society was always suspicious of them and
made their life miserable . Some made it inspite of all the
resistance like Ramesh ( not his real name ) . He was involved in a
gang fight . He and his friends beat up a guy to his death. He served
few years in prison and was sent to exile . ( buang daerah). He used
to come to my clinic with complain of gastric pain . Knowing he was a
criminal , I was always nasty to him . Inspite of that he kept coming
back to me . One day he asked my if the Waja car parked outside was
mine . How long I had not washed the car . I told him that i had no
time and the car was not washed for more then 6 mths . He offered to
wash my car . He asked for the car keys . I refused . He kept
persuading me . ( ya sure . So that you can con me and drive away in
my car . ) I was reluctant but somehow I gave in and gave him my car
keys . Since then he came in every Monday to take my car to the car
wash and gets it washed for me . He met this girl who fell in love
with him and was ready to marry him . He introduced her to me . I
asked her if she was out of her mind to marry a convict. Did she
think about her future ? She seems to be in clear mind and believed
that she can change him . She was confident in her decision . To make
the story short . Ramesh has a small car wash shop now ( learned
about car wash when he was sending my car for washing ) .
Behind every successful men there is a woman behind . I will agree .
Like some , I was no angel . My wife changed me . Gang fights , bike
racing and other activity become a past . The birth of my son ,
changed me totally.
I never cared for the society. I believed the Indians were born
stupid and were cursed to be fooled by the leaders they chose to
lead . They can't think for themselves . The only follow people who
deliver fancy dialogues . Anyone who delivers a punch line from a
Rajnikant's movie is the leader . They way of improving the Indian
community is sitting in a coffee shop drinking a couple of beers and
talk about politics the whole night and go home to have more babies .
This was told to me by a husband whose wife was pregnant with the 6th
child . I advice them to have family planning and the man who is a
MIC branch Chairman explained that the Indian population was
decreasing and his leader has proposed that every family should have
more children . Yes , I agree . If you are well to do and can
educated all the children , why not but when you are from a lower or
middle class family do you really think you can support all of
them .
Today I am worried for my children's future . 20 years from now have
is their life going to be . A Great country like America who once
upon a time were a bunch of racist and treated the blacks like a
slave , today had accepted a black man as their President . They are
moving forward . Our country seems to moving the other way round .It
took a black man more than 150 years to move from slavery and finaly
to the post of President . The Chinese are sending their children's
overseas and eventually one by one are migrating . The Indians who
are from well to do family are also eventually migrating . With
Education opportunities and job opportunities slowly being deprived
how are we going to survive . Quality of education in our country is
so shameful . People getting 13 A and 17 A and even 20 A in exam and
they can barely speak a good English .
The Indian community appear to be lost . Inspite of everything
discussed regarding the need for action to elevate our community ,
people are still talking about chariot procession , building temples
and what is the latest movie released. Half of the younger generation
are not bothered about their future are busy colouring their hair and
picking on the latest designer clothes so that the can look good for
Thaipusam . Today in the restaurant I overheard few girls discussing
about the saree blouse design and they were referring to some actress
saree blouse design from a movie. The worst victims whether you
realise or not are the children . 20 years from now , many of them
don't know what future holds for them as they have no proper
guidance . With the country moving further backwards with UMNO
ruining it for everyone , they might just end up back in plantation
like their fore fathers .
I deal with people of a races everyday . I got an sms last night from
my nurse ( malay ) asking everyone to wear red in the spirit of
celebrating Chinese New Year . The people have learned to live in
unity . The people have learned to live in harmony understanding and
tolerating each culture.The only people who refuse to let people live
in harmony are the politicians .
"The things that will destroy us are: politics without principle;
pleasure without conscience; wealth without
work; knowledge without character; business without morality; science
without humanity; and worship
without sacrifice."
--Mahatma Gandhi
Hindraf though I do not agree with some of the ways they handle
things , brought about unity in our community . They managed to make
our community to think . March 8 was a lesson to everyone especially
to Barisan .Yet they do not seem to be learning their lesson right .
As for our community , we will see the daylight only when the
leadership changes .
Kugan's death was the choice he took . You live by the sword , you
die by the sword. His death reminds me only of the choice I choose .
If I had not changed my ways , if during the course of my life the
right people had not appeared at the right time to guide me through
the right path the thief within me would have taken shape. I would
have crossed the thin line and would have not known that I have lost
my path till it was too late . For this I thank my parents for their
sacrifice and the hardship that they endured to educate me , I thank
my brother and my sister who gave way to my parents limited financial
ability to support me and to motivate me . I thank the teachers who
believed in me and kept pushing me to succeed . I thank the good
friends I had who stood by me during my difficult times . I am
grateful to my wife , who patiently and lovingly pushed me to the
good life that I have . Finally I thank God , who miraculously
happens to be there when the going gets tough. With good parents ,
good friends , good wife and God's blessing , the thief within me is
locked up .
"It is good to see ourselves as others see us. Try as we may, we are
never able to know ourselves fully as
we are, especially the evil side of us. This we can do only if we are
not angry with our critics but will take in
good heart whatever they might have to say."
--Mahatma Gandhi
As for our community , with increasing awareness among us and with
unity growing rapidly and with greater desire to help this
community , I have faith in this community . We will once again rise
to a greater height . One day an Indian will become the Prime
Minister.
There is part of Kugan within all of us . What made the different was
the choice we took . There is a thief in us . Whether he succeed in
influencing us to chose the easy life by walking the path carved by
darkness or the desire to chose the right path and to succeed with
hard work lies within each of us .
"In the attitude of silence the soul finds the path in a clearer
light, and what is elusive and deceptive
resolves itself into crystal clearness."
--Mahatma Gandhi (1869-1948)
DR.SREEDHARAN
drmsree@yahoo.com
reaction in our community . Many were disgusted with the way the he
was treated . Some were glad he had died so that he will not be out
of prison to commit another crime and some were upset about how quick
we were to judge a person. All of us are right in our own way of
thinking .
"Man and his deed are two distinct things. Whereas a good deed should
call forth approbation, and a
wicked deed disapprobation, the doer of the deed, whether good or
wicked always deserves respect or pity
as the case may be."
--Mahatma Gandhi
I am going to stick to my judgement . Kugan is a thief . Am I wrong
to be quick to judge an innocent man who happen to be in the wrong
place in the wrong time ? No I am not . I can tell you exactly how
Kugan was when he was alive and I won't be wrong . How he lived his
life is no longer our concern . How he died is our concern now .
Whether justice will be served or not – ( I can tell you it will not
be ) . Based on all the past records that I have gone thru , even if
the officers who caused the death of Kugan in the police custody gets
convicted , the punishment he will receive will not be up to the par
of the crime he had committed .
"Destruction is not the law of humans. Man lives freely only by his
readiness to die, if need be, at the hands of his brother, never by
killing him. Every murder or other injury,
no matter for what cause, committed or inflicted on another is a
crime against humanity."
--Mahatma Gandhi
There were few interesting mails I got from those who had read my
articles . Most of them were sad . Many had the delusion that they
were doing something good by giving a second chance to an ex-convicts
and in return got cheated and robbed of their belongings . Many kinds
souls felt everyone deserve a second chance and would go all out to
rehabilitate those who chose the wrong dark path and guide them back
to the right path . Not many succeeded . Why did they fail ? Whose
fault was it ? Why in spite of being given a second chance , the
person we try to help chooses the dark path again . Was the choice
his or was the choice forced into him ? The answer to that is within
all of us . The choice was ours . We chose to live the live we want
to live , the society forces us to chose the life we do not chose
but the forces within us decides when we cross the line .
There is a very thin line between the forces of good and evil . Some
stick to the safe side due to fear of God and his punishment . Many
cross these lines and realise the mistake and cross back and start to
live the right life . Few cross the line and enjoy the adrenaline
rush of committing a crime and enjoy the luxury and the trill. These
are the people who are the most difficult to change .
During my days has Medical Officer in the Psychiatric department ,
Thursday afternoon is the most dreaded afternoon when the hardcore
criminals from the prison are sent for assessment and treatment .
There are many of them . Each of them have an interesting stories .
There few I never forgot . This is one of them :
Dressed in white uniform , escorted by 4 prison guards with chains on
his legs and both hands hand-cuffed to the other 2 prison warden ,
stood a six foot Indian man weighing probably a 100kg . This reminded
me of the character in Tom Hanks movie . 4 prison wardens and this
huge man were enough to make my small room to appear crowded. I hate
it when my room gets crowded and that suffocates me . Anyway this man
had vibhuti and kunkumum ( thilak ) on his forehead and inspite of
his fierce look had a pious appearance . That fascinated me . He
greeted me with so much politeness. His English was good and appeared
to be an Educated men . I assumed this must be another cool cheating
case. What surprised me was on his card it was written Section 302
awaiting sentencing . Before we started our session , Prabahakaran (
not his real name ) requested for a letter to the warden to provide
him with vegetarian diet . I agreed . Initially we talked about how
life was in prison , then we went on to speak about religion . He
seems to be very religious . Spends a lot of time meditating and
praying . He reads a lot about religion . Gradually I asked him about
the crimes that he had committed . He is accused of murdering 7
people ( on the record ) . 3 happens to be Police officers and the
other 4 was members of the family whose house he had robbed . I asked
him what happen , initially he was very reluctant to talk about it .
I keep persisting since non of the wardens understand tamil , it was
safe to talk . Seeing that I was so interested he explained to me
briefly . I wanted more details . It was only then he spoke in great
detail . He had no remorse in killing those people . He describe
every crime he committed like an art . He enjoyed everything he did
and I could see it very clearly . He is not a change man . If he is
put back in the society , he will commit the same crime again . I
know many who have been sentenced to death by hanging eventually had
their sentences converted to life term based on their good behaviour
and other things . ( which I am not allowed to say ) .
Some who had committed petty crimes , found it difficult to survive
in the outside world . the society refused to give them a change .
Though they were driven with motivation to change their life and to
lead the right life , the society was always suspicious of them and
made their life miserable . Some made it inspite of all the
resistance like Ramesh ( not his real name ) . He was involved in a
gang fight . He and his friends beat up a guy to his death. He served
few years in prison and was sent to exile . ( buang daerah). He used
to come to my clinic with complain of gastric pain . Knowing he was a
criminal , I was always nasty to him . Inspite of that he kept coming
back to me . One day he asked my if the Waja car parked outside was
mine . How long I had not washed the car . I told him that i had no
time and the car was not washed for more then 6 mths . He offered to
wash my car . He asked for the car keys . I refused . He kept
persuading me . ( ya sure . So that you can con me and drive away in
my car . ) I was reluctant but somehow I gave in and gave him my car
keys . Since then he came in every Monday to take my car to the car
wash and gets it washed for me . He met this girl who fell in love
with him and was ready to marry him . He introduced her to me . I
asked her if she was out of her mind to marry a convict. Did she
think about her future ? She seems to be in clear mind and believed
that she can change him . She was confident in her decision . To make
the story short . Ramesh has a small car wash shop now ( learned
about car wash when he was sending my car for washing ) .
Behind every successful men there is a woman behind . I will agree .
Like some , I was no angel . My wife changed me . Gang fights , bike
racing and other activity become a past . The birth of my son ,
changed me totally.
I never cared for the society. I believed the Indians were born
stupid and were cursed to be fooled by the leaders they chose to
lead . They can't think for themselves . The only follow people who
deliver fancy dialogues . Anyone who delivers a punch line from a
Rajnikant's movie is the leader . They way of improving the Indian
community is sitting in a coffee shop drinking a couple of beers and
talk about politics the whole night and go home to have more babies .
This was told to me by a husband whose wife was pregnant with the 6th
child . I advice them to have family planning and the man who is a
MIC branch Chairman explained that the Indian population was
decreasing and his leader has proposed that every family should have
more children . Yes , I agree . If you are well to do and can
educated all the children , why not but when you are from a lower or
middle class family do you really think you can support all of
them .
Today I am worried for my children's future . 20 years from now have
is their life going to be . A Great country like America who once
upon a time were a bunch of racist and treated the blacks like a
slave , today had accepted a black man as their President . They are
moving forward . Our country seems to moving the other way round .It
took a black man more than 150 years to move from slavery and finaly
to the post of President . The Chinese are sending their children's
overseas and eventually one by one are migrating . The Indians who
are from well to do family are also eventually migrating . With
Education opportunities and job opportunities slowly being deprived
how are we going to survive . Quality of education in our country is
so shameful . People getting 13 A and 17 A and even 20 A in exam and
they can barely speak a good English .
The Indian community appear to be lost . Inspite of everything
discussed regarding the need for action to elevate our community ,
people are still talking about chariot procession , building temples
and what is the latest movie released. Half of the younger generation
are not bothered about their future are busy colouring their hair and
picking on the latest designer clothes so that the can look good for
Thaipusam . Today in the restaurant I overheard few girls discussing
about the saree blouse design and they were referring to some actress
saree blouse design from a movie. The worst victims whether you
realise or not are the children . 20 years from now , many of them
don't know what future holds for them as they have no proper
guidance . With the country moving further backwards with UMNO
ruining it for everyone , they might just end up back in plantation
like their fore fathers .
I deal with people of a races everyday . I got an sms last night from
my nurse ( malay ) asking everyone to wear red in the spirit of
celebrating Chinese New Year . The people have learned to live in
unity . The people have learned to live in harmony understanding and
tolerating each culture.The only people who refuse to let people live
in harmony are the politicians .
"The things that will destroy us are: politics without principle;
pleasure without conscience; wealth without
work; knowledge without character; business without morality; science
without humanity; and worship
without sacrifice."
--Mahatma Gandhi
Hindraf though I do not agree with some of the ways they handle
things , brought about unity in our community . They managed to make
our community to think . March 8 was a lesson to everyone especially
to Barisan .Yet they do not seem to be learning their lesson right .
As for our community , we will see the daylight only when the
leadership changes .
Kugan's death was the choice he took . You live by the sword , you
die by the sword. His death reminds me only of the choice I choose .
If I had not changed my ways , if during the course of my life the
right people had not appeared at the right time to guide me through
the right path the thief within me would have taken shape. I would
have crossed the thin line and would have not known that I have lost
my path till it was too late . For this I thank my parents for their
sacrifice and the hardship that they endured to educate me , I thank
my brother and my sister who gave way to my parents limited financial
ability to support me and to motivate me . I thank the teachers who
believed in me and kept pushing me to succeed . I thank the good
friends I had who stood by me during my difficult times . I am
grateful to my wife , who patiently and lovingly pushed me to the
good life that I have . Finally I thank God , who miraculously
happens to be there when the going gets tough. With good parents ,
good friends , good wife and God's blessing , the thief within me is
locked up .
"It is good to see ourselves as others see us. Try as we may, we are
never able to know ourselves fully as
we are, especially the evil side of us. This we can do only if we are
not angry with our critics but will take in
good heart whatever they might have to say."
--Mahatma Gandhi
As for our community , with increasing awareness among us and with
unity growing rapidly and with greater desire to help this
community , I have faith in this community . We will once again rise
to a greater height . One day an Indian will become the Prime
Minister.
There is part of Kugan within all of us . What made the different was
the choice we took . There is a thief in us . Whether he succeed in
influencing us to chose the easy life by walking the path carved by
darkness or the desire to chose the right path and to succeed with
hard work lies within each of us .
"In the attitude of silence the soul finds the path in a clearer
light, and what is elusive and deceptive
resolves itself into crystal clearness."
--Mahatma Gandhi (1869-1948)
DR.SREEDHARAN
drmsree@yahoo.com
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